Happy Birthday
by fireflylightning
Summary: When Beyond Birthday told L he had something special planned she wasn't expecting a massacre. Fem!L


**Author's Note: Happy Samhain! Or as everyone I've ever met besides my sister and my father calls it Halloween. Also, Happy Birthday to L Lawliet. If you saw Fem!L in the summery and were thinking, **_**Oh God, Why? **_**I have my reasons. 1. The plot required L to wear a dress. Can you honestly see normal L willingly wearing a dress? 2. I've yet to see any BBxFem!L on this website. I've seen Fem!BBxL though. Although my may be searching skills are a little on the suckish side. 3. For the sake of good old rule 63. 4. Because I wanted to. Those are my reasons. For those of you who have never heard of Beyond Birthday, he is the serial killer from the spinoff novel: LABB Murder Cases. He was absolutely obsessed with L and the prospect of surpassing him. Beyond Birthday and L behave and L look and behave so similarly that the reader is lead to believe that Beyond Birthday **_**is**_** L until the end (although he was revealed to be wearing makeup to resemble L and was probably acting similarly to L on purpose due to his obsession.) I don't think there are any spoilers from the book, but I am not quite sure to be honest. This is my first attempt at writing horror or any sort of murder scene so I apologize if it isn't the best.**

**Warnings: Contains a gender bent L (as mentioned before). Also, Beyond Birthday is a character, therefore it contains most of the things that would make you the smartest parent ever if you trusted him to babysit your children.**

**Pairings: Mainly BBxL, but there is some implied MelloxMatt and AxL.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Death Note Beyond Birthday would've popped up in the actual series and Matt would've had a larger role. Trust me.**

L wasn't the kind of girl who liked wearing dresses. She hated them so so so much. She couldn't sit in her usual fashion if she was in a dress because Roger and Watari say it is 'unladylike'. Dresses are always too tight or too revealing or too stuffy. She nearly gave Mello a black eye when he bought her one for Christmas. Later that Christmas she ended up sulking in the corner because Watari informed her that she couldn't burn it. _I guess I look sort of cute_, she thought to herself as she stared her reflection down in the mirror. She was wearing a strapless black dress that poofed out at the skirt with a white ribbon across the waist and large white polka-dots (she was barefoot as usual.) Actually this was the very dress she almost gave Mello a black eye over. What was she thinking? Oh yeah, Beyond Birthday asked her to wear it. He said it was a special occasion. L wasn't quite sure why she was so quick to do whatever the red eyed boy commanded, but she didn't feel like it was that important because it wasn't like he was a demonic creature or anything. She's right he isn't. Not exactly. 

A knock on her old bedroom door snapped her out of her inner monologue, "Come in!"

Her door creaked open slowly, "You shouldn't be so fast to let people in your room Lawlipop. Someone could hurt you." It was Beyond.

L didn't turn to face him, "But I knew it was you. There is no danger there because I know you would never hurt me."

He walked across the room and wrapped his arms around her waist very tightly and laughed, "Oh, my sweet, sweet Lawli. Sweet as all the candy she eats. Always has trust in humankind. Believing that the good guys always win. So… so… uncorrupted and innocent." He kissed her on the forehead. It was moments that this that made L wonder if she was wrong and he really was a demonic creature of some sort. You're close L. So close.

"Backup, please release me." L uttered calmly and evenly.

Wrath flashed in the jam lover's eyes and he tightened his grip on L's waist, "I told you to never call me that again."

L winced because Beyond was holding her way to tight and mumbled, "Sorry about that Beyond Birthday."

He loosened his grip, "That's much better."

L struggled out of his arms and turned to face him, "So what your reason for making me wear this…this thing."

Beyond grinned so wide it would scare a Cheshire Cat, "I already told you Lawli. It's a special occasion." He ruffled her hair.

L who was starting to get the feeling that Beyond was treating her like a child on purpose stated, "Are Mello and Matt coming out of the closet? Did Near finally put away his toys? Is it Smuckers fiftieth anniversary? Has Akazukin Cha Cha been continued?"

Beyond stared up at the ceiling with his blood red eyes, "No, no, no, and I wish."

L giggled at Beyond's obsession with that particular shoujo, "Then what-"

Beyond put his hand over her mouth, "Shhh… I hear footsteps." He dragged her down to the floor and they put their heads next to the door.

They could hear someone talking, "I don't know about this Roger…" L recognized Watari's voice in an instant and raised her eyebrows in curiosity. Beyond's already alarming smile grew even wider. Everything was going exactly as he expected it to.

Another voice, Roger's voice, responded, "Now, Quillish don't be silly." Roger used Watari's first name. The first name that even L, Watari's favorite orphan, didn't know until now. Now L was even more curious as to what exactly was going on.

"But the kids-" Watari sounded worried.

"Will be perfectly fine. There are a bunch of them and they're all brighter than both of us combined. I am sure they can take care of one another. Besides it is just for one night." Roger said assertively.

Watari continued his protest, "Roger-"

Roger softened his tone, "Everyone needs a little vacation every once in a little while. I swear those kids will send you to an early grave if you don't."

Watari sighed, "Fine Roger, you can have your way."

Roger sounded like he was smiling, "Let's get going then." The footsteps resumed. The teenagers sat at the bottom of the door for a few minutes after they could no longer hear the footsteps before they got up off the ground.

L glanced at Beyond and tilted her head, "What do you think that was all about?"

Beyond shrugged, "Don't know. Don't care. What matters is that there will be no adult supervision tonight."

L wasn't sure how she felt about that. In all of her days at Wammy's House there was always a responsible adult somewhere. She cautiously inquired, "Did you know about this beforehand?"

Beyond rolled his eyes, "Of course I did. I have something special planned for me and you to do together tonight."

L absolutely abhorred not knowing things, "What are you planning Beyond?"

Beyond decided to tease the uncorrupted girl a little bit and keep the suspense going until she was inside his bedroom, "A game of some sorts."

L lit up like a firework show, "I rather like games."

Beyond walked over to her dresser and pulled out a scarf and tied it over her eyes, "You can't peak." L pouted and Beyond laughed at how adorably childish the world's top three rated detectives could be, "Grab my hand I'll guide you to where I need you to go."

L nodded, "Okay." She did as requested. Beyond excitedly pulled her behind him and L had to move quickly to keep up with each one of his purposeful strides. Beyond had wanted to do this for a long time, but he never thought he would actually get the chance. Hell, he had to keep a tight grip on her hand as he led her to his bedroom to make sure she was really there and not imagined. His plans wouldn't go too well if this L was a figment of his imagination. She was real nonetheless. Beyond's heart was racing. _What if she doesn't want to do it?_ One voice in head asked him. Beyond hadn't really considered that (extremely likely) possibility because he didn't want to think about it. That possibility always made him a little sad. _Well, then he would just_ _have to use force_, A second voice informed the first. Yes that's exactly what he will do. Beyond liked second voice a considerable amount more than the first.

They came to a halt at his bedroom door. "Are we there?" L asked.

"Yes." Beyond fished the key out of his pocket. He tried to get it in the lock, but his hands were shaking too much. Why am I so nervous? It's L's first time not mine, he mentally reminded himself. The hand finally steadied and he slipped the key into the lock and opened the door, "You are going to love this." He pulled her inside with him and locked the heavy soundproof door behind him.

"Can you undo the scarf now?" L asked once she heard the click of the locking door.

Beyond hesitated, "Yes of course." She slowly undid the square knot and lifted the scarf that blinded her. L took a look around and… was absolutely horrified. Alternate, Mello, Matt, Near, Linda, Maria, Jailer, and Quarter Queen were all tied up and gagged looking as horrified as L was.

L was about to let out a scream that would give a banshee a run for its money, but Beyond Birthday put a hand over her mouth, "Do you like your unbirthday present Lawli?" He removed his hand from her mouth.

L took a while to formulate words, "I really don't know you at all. Do I?"

Beyond frowned and faked a hurt tone as he wrapped his arms around L's waist for the second time that day, "Lawli I am very offended by that remark. I went through all of the trouble of getting them here for you without anybody else noticing and all." Beyond began to make little kisses down her neck, "You aren't wrong though. You never are."

"Get off of me!" L exclaimed as she pushed him to the ground, "What… what is this?"

Beyond brushed himself off, walked across the room, and opened his closet. He rummaged around a little bit before he plucked out a Louisville Slugger and a rifle. He swiftly placed the rifle on his belt. He strolled over next to Matt who was trying to wriggle far away from the otaku. His beautiful smile was even more unsettling than usual, "I'm gonna bash it in." He hoisted the baseball bat high above his head and slammed it down hard and fast on to the poor boy with a smoking problem's head. There was a sickening crunch. The rest of the captives panicked and tried begging for their lives, but their gags muffled the sound as Beyond put down the now blood stained bat.

L tried to run for the door, but Beyond grabbed her arm with his blood soaked hands and yanked her into his chest, "Leaving so soon Lawli. The fun has barely just begun." L ever so slightly felt his teeth nibbling her earlobe and shuddered.

L was trying really hard not to shed any tears, "You killed Matt. The fifth in line to succeed me. Matt, the one who taught me how to hack into any computer in the world at any given moment. Matt, the kid who would tell the teacher that he had to go to the bathroom when he wanted to go outside to smoke. Matt, the kid who gave me a video game for Christmas even though he knew I didn't know how to work the gaming platform it was made for because he wanted me to watch him play it. Matt, who was in a happy relationship with Mello. Sure, they weren't open about it, but everyone could tell. You just killed him. How… how could you?" A single salty tear escaped L without her notice.

Beyond wiped the tear away, "Please don't cry my Lawlipop. There are seven more to go."

L shook her head. Her tone was filled with her immature confidence, "No you can't. You can't do that to all these people. I won't let you. Killing is wrong. Justice shall prevail."

Beyond laughed in that demonic fashion of his and moved his hand in between her thighs, "How can something be wrong when it feels so right."

L stomped on his foot, "Don't touch me!"

Beyond stomped on her foot (much harder then she had) in return, "Don't tell me what to do." His voice was calm and quiet. So quiet she almost couldn't hear him. It would've been less petrifying if he would have screamed at her at the top of his lungs. His hand had moved up higher and was now playing with the waist band of her panties.

L gulped, "Is this why you wanted me to wear a dress today?"

Beyond spoke to her as if she was a small child, "No. A lady should always wear a dresses on special occasions. I think the murder of all of these people is a very special occasion indeed. This is just an added bonus."

"You are not going to hurt another person again tonight. I can promise you that," L stated in her usual monotone.

"Lawli, didn't someone ever tell you not to make promises you can't keep. Also, I've noticed you keep referring to me as if I am the only one that will be doing the killing," Beyond pulled his hand out from under L's skirt and strolled to his little closet of horrors. He pulled out an ax and placed it firmly in L's hand, "You're gonna be my accomplice Lawlipop. Since it'll be your first kill I'm going to let you pick. You can choose from anyone of our little guests." He gestured to the fellow orphans tied up on the floor.

L tried to give the ax back, but Beyond wouldn't let her, "I can't take another human's life away from them. Everyone deserves to live."

Beyond patted her on the back. It would've been comforting if L hadn't of been completely convinced the boy was a demon at the moment, "Oh, I see the problem. They would all be so much fun to kill you have no idea who to pick. You're telling yourself you don't want kill anyone so that you don't have to choose. When in reality you want to kill one of them so badly that you need it. You really shouldn't lie to yourself. I know how I can help you shatter that delusion my love," Beyond picked up Alternate and sat him up on the bed, "You should kill this one. Stick it in the back of his head." Alternate started to violently shake his head back and forth and he was saying something in a panicked tone, but the gag muffled the sound.

L was taken aback by Beyond's completely insane logic, "But-"

Beyond cut her off, "Forgive me for my forgetfulness. It is always so much more fun when you can hear their pathetic cries for mercy." He removed Alternate's gag.

Alternate's panicked voice could be understood now, "L don't do it. This isn't what you-"

Beyond slapped Alternate, "You know nothing about her, you worthless fuck."

L walked slowly over to the bed side until she was only a couple steps away from Alternate, "Don't worry A. I am not going to-" Beyond gave her an incredibly hard shove from behind. L fell forward and landed on top of Alternate.

She heard Alternate scream in agony. Blood was pouring from his mouth. His cobalt eyes held one last look of betrayal in them before the light faded out of them. L looked down. Her ax was buried in his stomach and her hands were on the handle. She pulled the ax out and dropped it on the ground. Her arms tightly wrapped around the corpse as if Alternate was some sort of plush toy made by a sick and twisted toymaker and she started sobbing. L wasn't someone who would ever cry in front of others if she could help it, but right now she didn't give a damn. She just killed Alternate. A few moments ago he was in this room with her, but now all that's left is a shell, and it was all her fault. She remembered how he almost committed suicide a few times, but she was always able to talk him out of it. She remembered the pink roses he gave her on Valentine's Day. She remembered how when she was sulking because she couldn't burn this dress he tried to make her feel better by informing her that she would look lovely in it and failed. The dress was now soaked in Alternative's blood. Beyond began trying to pull L off of the corpse. L refused to let go like a stubborn child. She wanted to hold Alternative and cry forever. What kind of friend would she be if she let go? Beyond eventually succeeded prying the mourning teenage girl's limbs off of the dead body.

Beyond gripped her chin forced her to look him in the eye, "I am so proud of you. The first kill is always the hardest."

L whimpered, "Why would you make me do that?"

Beyond pressed his forehead to hers and said in his gentlest (thus most manipulative) voice, "Because we love each other. Because I love you I want you to be happy. Because I love you I wanted to give you a romantic unbirthday gift to make you happy. This your gift. You love blood. You love the way it looks, feels, smells, and tastes. You love the delicious sound of a scream. You love seeing them writhe in pain. You love to murder. You love all of this almost as much as you love me. Now, wasn't that fun?" This was the moment of truth. L is traumatized and is in a highly suggestible state at the moment. _If all goes well_, Beyond thought_, the great L_ _will be mine._ The captives were silently praying that L would not believe him (but not Near because he was an atheist).

One half of L wanted to believe that she and Beyond were lovers and that she liked killing people. She wanted to melt in his words. He sounded so sincere and caring and trustworthy and warm and gentle and like her really loved her. The other half of her was telling that this was all bullshit. Beyond was just a friend to her. He didn't love her either. He couldn't love her. There was no way somebody like Beyond even has the ability to feel love. She hated killing. L took a while to answer Beyond's question because she was on a full out mental civil war. She smiled, "Yes it was so very fun. I am very sorry about my behavior earlier. I don't know what came over me. Thank you, Beyond. I'm your little murder tramp." She kissed him on the cheek. You can guess which side won. Beyond became stupidly gleeful while those of them tied up made the unanimous decision that there is no god.

Beyond looked at the newfound atheists at his feet and pointed at Maria and Linda, "L did you know that those two are sisters?" L plopped down on the floor next to them.

As L talked she started playing with their hair, "You two are so lucky. I don't have any real family left. They all died when I was real little. I don't remember if I had siblings or not. I wonder what it would be like to have a brother or sister. Sure, I sometimes think of Mello and Near as little brothers, but that can't be the same. I am jealous of you. I've never been jealous before. It doesn't feel to good." The sisters looked at each other. Any other situation they would've loved to have L be jealous of them, but right now it could only be bad news.

Beyond took his rifle off of his belt and shot Maria right between the eyes. A single drop of crimson from the bullet wound went down the middle of her face like a tear from the corner of an eye, "You don't have to feel bad any more Lawli. Now she doesn't have a sister either."

L popped up and gave Beyond a bear hug, "Thank you. I love you." The survivors (so far) can do nothing but look at this unholy union in horror.

Beyond ended the hug, "We have to get something from your room Lawlipop."

"But I wanna stay with my new friends." L whined.

Beyond smiled, "We will be right back to play with your friends as soon as we can."

L looked at 'her friends', "I think they're going to miss me though." She couldn't of been more wrong.

Beyond flashed a one hundred watt smile at this new L he had created, his L, "Then you should kiss them goodbye to make them feel better."

L jumped with joy, "Did anyone ever tell you how wonderful you are?"

She got down on her knees and started crawling from person to person. First was Near. He stayed still and emotionless as if he had already died as L kissed him on the forehead. Usually he would push people away when they attempted to kiss him. It must be the ropes. Next came Mello. He stared her deep in the eyes trying to communicate his message of 'snap out of it'. The message didn't get across. Then it was Linda's turn. She kept moving her head back and forth, and it took a solid five minutes for L to give her a kiss on the forehead. After Linda was Jailer. Jailer seemed like he was going to cry. L thought it was because he missed her already and she reassured him. He still seemed very sad. Last was Quarter Queen. She was trying to say something to L, but the gag made it futile.

As the partners in crime walked out the room Beyond shouted behind him, "Have a very merry unbirthday!" They were all having a very special unbirthday. Not a merry one.

After Beyond locked the door behind him L turned to him, "I'll race you." She took off like a bullet.

Beyond rolled his eyes, "That's no fair." He ran after the detective in the black dress with red polka dots. Didn't those polka dots used to be white?

They both sprinted to L's room at top speed. Despite her head start, when L finally made it inside her room Beyond was sitting on the bed waiting for her, "I think I should get a prize because I won."

L bit her lip, "What do you want Beyond?"

Beyond grinned and walked slowly towards her, "Nothing much. Just this." He grabbed her face with both hands. Within the next moment he was stealing her first kiss. It was a greedy and possessive kiss. As if he was trying to say 'you are mine and mine alone' with his tongue. He broke the kiss sucking in the much needed oxygen to his brain, "We'll have more time for that later," He took a look around at his surroundings, "Where do you keep your video camera?"

L genuinely had to think about that because she never actually used it, "Ummm… it's in the shoebox under the bed." Sure enough the video camera was there.

He grabbed the camera, "We should get going back to my room. By the way red is definitely your color." The corners of L's mouth turned upwards. She couldn't wait to kill everyone in that room. Now theres a sentence I never thought I'd write about L.

Once they were back in the room L was about to pick up the ax, but Beyond held her back. "What's wrong Beyond?"

The red-eyed teen pulled the camera out of his back pocket, "We can't forget about the video Lawli." He turned the device on, pointed it at his face, and began the small speech he had been planning in his mind since the day he first met L, "Hello Quillish Wammy. Hello Roger Ruvie. If you couldn't tell this is Beyond Birthday speaking. I fixed the prodigy Elle Lawliet." Beyond had a small fit of psychopathic laughter when he calmed himself down he continued, "Or I broke her. You can be the judge of that. Here I'll show you her right now. Don't forget to smile."

He pointed the camera at L who was smiling just like he requested, "Hi camera."

Beyond was amazed at how well this was going for him, "Tell me your opinions on Roger and Watari."

L frowned, "I never liked Roger. He was always so mean to all of us. He liked taking away my candy." L smiled again, "But Watari is like the grandpa I never had. He spoiled me rotten like grandpas often do. Watari let me eat as many sweets and stay up as late as I wanted."

Beyond's voice was caring yet strangely malicious, "I'm sure this video will make him proud my little murder tramp."

"But I don't care if he is proud of me anymore. There was a time where I cared. I cared a lot. It didn't matter how many cases I cracked or how many lives I saved he just wasn't proud of me. So, I just stopped caring my murder boy." L stated devoid of emotion.

Beyond declared the good news (good for L and himself, bad for everyone else), "Okay, Lawlipop that's enough introduction. You can pick up your ax now."

"Yay!" L proclaimed as she lifted the ax off of the floor as if it was the best thing in the world.

"I think Linda is crying." He pointed at the living girl with the light brown hair. Little droplets of water were spilling from her eyes.

L tilted her head, "But isn't she having fun?"

Beyond suggested, "I think she misses her sister. Will you reunite them Lawipop?"

L clicked her heels, "Of course I will Beyond Birthday. I wouldn't be your murder tramp if didn't." She chopped off Linda's head with a single swing. Linda's head rolled across the floor and stopped right next to Near. Near's head came off next. It didn't roll too far, but when it stopped it was looking Linda dead in the eye.

Beyond giggled, "I don't think Near has ever held eye contact with anyone for so long before."

L shrugged, "We both know how introverted he was."

Beyond tilted his head, "I think it is Jailer's turn now." Jailer tried to shimmy as far away from L as possible, but his efforts were fruitless and he lost his head anyway.

L was perplexed, "Why did he try to get away from me?"

Beyond did what he does best. He lied to her and said, "I guess we'll never know."

L frowned, "I don't like not knowing things."

Beyond looked up, "I have something that I want to know."

L was curious, "What would that be?"

Beyond shook his head, "No. It's nothing. I was just wondering what kind of underwear Quarter Queen is wearing." Quarter Queen's eyes widened an almost impossible amount.

L crouched over next to Quarter Queen, "That's easy enough to find out Beyond Birthday." L ripped off Quarter Queen's shirt and threw the pieces over her shoulder. Next L slid Quarter Queen's skinny jeans down to her ankles. "See Beyond. Now you know what her underwear looks like." Quarter Queen was wearing a white sports bra and white cotton granny panties.

Beyond sighed, "It's a little disappointing."

L swung her ax down on to Quarter Queen's neck, "Well, she can't disappoint you anymore. She's dead."

Beyond pointed the camera at Mello, "Well, Mello it seems that you'll be the last to die."

L peacefully skipped over to Mello with ax in hand and got down to his level, "You're so pretty Mells." Mello winced at the new nickname. L started stroking his face, "I am sure Matt will be elated to see you again. You know in terms of personality I always liked you better. You had a much more fun personality then Near did. Any last words?" L removed Mello's gag.

Mello locked eyes with L and said in a gravely serious tone, "You are so much better than this L."

L didn't agree, "That's just your opinion Mello." She used the ax to end yet another life.

Beyond turned the camera back to his face, "I hope you like what I've done to Elle Lawliet. Don't try to find us… or actually please do try. It's not like you'll succeed. Goodbye Roger Ruvie. Goodbye Quillish Wammy." He turned the camera off.

~~~~~~~Time skip brought to you by MisaMisa's Happy Sweets~~~~~~~

When Roger and Watari returned to Wammy's house in the early hours of the morning long before any of the orphans had awakened they had the unmistakable feeling that something was off. It was clean. Too clean. There was no dust anywhere. A newfound aroma of lemongrass filled the air. All of the glass in the house sparkled like it was made out of diamonds. Even the light bulbs seemed to have been polished. It shouldn't be possible for a place packed to the rim with children to be this clean. The men shrugged it off as nothing and continued on their way to Roger's office to look at some of the children's files, but they couldn't make the shiver in their spines go away. When they got into the office they noticed a video camera was on the desk with a note next to it.

Watari picked the note up, "It says 'PRESS PLAY'."

Roger picked up the camera and turned it around a few times in his hand, "Where's the play button?" Watari rolled his eyes took the camera from Roger and pressed play. The two men watched the little video that Beyond Birthday made last night.

When it was over they shared a glance. "That was…" Watari trailed off because he wasn't quite sure how to describe the horrors within that video.

"…Incredibly fucking disturbing." Roger said finishing Watari's sentence.

Incredibly fucking disturbing. That's what Watari was trying to say. Although he wouldn't of used such strong language. "Bingo."

Roger awkwardly tried to pick the conservation, "It could've been worse."

Watari eyed Roger suspiciously, "How so?"

Roger scratched his chin, "Well, they could've murdered everyone in the orphanage and a segment of the video could've of been of them having intercourse."

"Is this really that much better?" Watari said gravely.

Roger realized Watari was right, "No, not really. Do you remember when we first brought Beyond Birthday here?" Watari nodded and Roger continued, "Remember how at first I wanted to give him back to that other orphanage because he had red eyes. I thought it meant he was the spawn of the devil. You convinced me otherwise. I've just been unconvinced."

Watari laughed bitterly and hollowly, "As have I old friend. As have I. We're going to have to track them down you know."

Roger took a double take, "Why?"

Watari looked at Roger as if it should be obvious, "This is our fault. We have to make things right."

Roger sighed at the inventor's strong sense of morality, "If you say so."

Watari patted Roger on the shoulder, "At least I learned something new."

Roger though about it for a few moments but couldn't grasp any lesson Watari could've learned, "What would that be?"

Watari stared straight ahead, "We can never leave them unsupervised again."

**Author's Note: I turned L into a female, Beyond Birthday molested her, and she became a killer. What a great way to celebrate one of my favorite characters of all time's birthday! If you were wondering why this story is entitled **_**Happy Birthday**_** when it is nobody's birthday in the story, it is quite simple really. It is L's birthday (duh) and I got the idea for this fic by listening to the song "Happy Birthday" by The Birthday Massacre. So, what do you think Watari and Roger were doing when they were gone because I'm not a thousand percent sure myself. This story is supposed to be a one-shot, but I might continue it if someone likes it and asks me to. Thank you for reading. Please tell me what you think of it. I have no way of knowing exactly how bad my writing is, thus no chance to improve it, if you don't review.**


End file.
